Harry Guakomoli was jolted from his naughty, albeit a bit disturbing, dream. Not sure if it really was the work of Filthy O'Possum or just his overactive imagination messing around, The Guak knew, one way or the other, what his future held in store for him if he didn't act. He refused to bow down to any man, to be his bitch.
There was, of course, one small complication: our hero was immobilized, strapped to a bed. Notice I wrote "small," dear reader, and I fucking meant it. The restraints were made of leather, and they were no match for The Guak. He breathed deeply and flexed all of his muscles all at once, and the leather straps that were holding him down snapped.
The Guak jumped to his feet and staggered: lightheadedness caused him to reel and forced him to lean against the bed for support. He might be conscious, but whatever that foul tomato soup was laced with still affected his mind. Not to mention the two blows to the head he took when he collapsed from the poison. His vision was blurry, and he tried to see if, by chance, that crazy German guy had outfitted him with kick ass oracular abilities. This was not the case.
In front of him stood some of Doktor Maschinemensch's wee henchmen. The Guak thought there were two of them, but with his eyesight all fucked up it was hard to tell. They stared at him with their unblinking vacant blue eyes. No reaction was to be gleaned from their pale expressionless faces.
"I know what you little fuckers are," growled The Guak. "And I'm going to take a lot of anger and frustration out on you. I had a lot of fond memories of that bodega. And now Oslo has to walk five extra minutes to score our malt liquor and Nutter Butters." With that The Guak lifted the bed up and sent it crashing down on the non-dwarves.
"Thanks, Dad," our hero said as he collapsed atop the bed. He wasn't sure if Filthy O'Possum truly was his ancestor, but The Guak knew he got his might from his old man. But that might have been the end of the power surge. The Guak felt his strength reserves depleted from the poisoned soup.
Another diminutive man entered the room holding a gun. It looked like a hunting rifle with some modifications: a black box hung from the barrel with two coils running from the box to just before the trigger. A loud hum emanated from this strange weapon. His would-be assailant aimed his gun towards The Guak. Our hero was too weak to do anything.
"Bonzai,motherfucker!" yelled Oslo as he darted into the room and pounced towards the gunman's face. The world's smartest cat had wanted to run roughshod on these little people ever since he arrived at Neuneuschwanstein. The sidekick was finally getting his wish. Oslo dug his claws into those soulless eyes, but something wasn't right. Metal crunched as Oslo drove his nails into the tiny man. Sparks flew from the sockets and electricity ran through our hero's hero.
The world's smartest cat convulsed violently as he was being electrocuted. Then the henchman's head exploded, sending Oslo flying. The blast knocked our four-legged friend against the stone wall, and landed on the overturned bed beside The Guak.
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